Cheaters and Players and Dogs, Oh My!
Hello there Ladies!
Okay, so we all know love is blind, and I know denial may seem like the less painful route, but let me tell you, if you find out your man is cheating, DO NOT stick around and cheat yourself! A little while ago, I received an email from a woman whose man had been playing her in the worst possible way, sleeping with several different women, calling lots of girls his girlfriend, and get this, he even had a WIFE! Wow! How do men like this go to sleep at night?! They better be sleeping with one eye open is all I have to say! But for the moment, let’s not focus on them. Let’s focus on a much more important factor, YOU. My advice to this anonymous woman and to all of my other lovely Ladies out there, demand the best out of this world. Demand it from all of your relationships, from your career, from yourself, and from every other aspect of your life. Life truly is what you make of it, and so are your relationships. So do not waste a minute of your precious time on a man who doesn’t know your value or respect your worth. Yes, people make mistakes, and I have seen couples bounce back from infidelity and be stronger for it. So, I realize this isn’t a black and white issue in every case. If your man “messed up” and is begging that you take him back, just realize that the power is in your hands. Is this man standing before you really going to step it up and be the man you need him to be? I don’t know. You are the judge and the jury on this one, so examine the facts. Notice I said facts, not emotions. Sometimes you really have to separate your head from your heart to make the clearest decision. Think about it, did he admit his mistake to you and apologize, or did you just find out on your own? If he didn’t come clean on his own, who knows what other dirty little secrets he may have. Also, is this just another let down by him? Is he always saying sorry for some huge mistake he made? Ladies listen, I know when you are in love you put on your rose tinted glasses and you try to see the glass as being half full. I get that, I do, just make sure your man isn’t full of it. If you do decide to give him another chance, keep your wits about you and make sure he is devoted to rebuilding trust. Sure, a lot of guys are happy to say they’re sorry, but they don’t want to put in the work it takes to actually heal a broken situation. If you decide to leave his sorry butt behind, trust that you are an incredible woman who will find a Gentleman to cherish you, not cheat on you.
August 15th, 2008 at 9:09 am
Interesting. Let me pose a different version. A married successful, attractive man…treats wife with all respect, love and kindness possible. Is an awesome father/provider. Any one that knows him/them knows of his character (good). Showers with gifts on random occasions (which is one of her love languages) to include spa packages, Victoria secret items (he would get and gift cards from his allowance).
Only pulls for communication and intimacy. Wife never returns or communicates anything he needs, but in turn he discovers she ends up giving it all to another man from her past. Now this man “went” the gentleman “route his entire life and ended up ending relationships due to “Women/Girlfriends” leaving for the guy that is not the gentleman. What do you tell this man when the constant issue is being a good man and always ending up on the short end of the stick?
An inquiring mind would LOVE to know.
August 16th, 2008 at 7:59 pm
Wow. I feel ur pain. I had an interesting conversation wit a guy i met just last night. He is suim1 my cuz’n is c’n 4 a month or 2 now. She brought him 2 speed on my relationship of three yrs.that is probably over but my guy wnt say so already. Instead he insists he needs space. Except i c him everyday wit the other girl he cheated on me wit. He cheated and will nvr apologize since we had wat wud b considered an open relationship, by his choice. Except i wz exclusive wit him. Well this guy said wat i hv 2 doregarding this betrayl bestowed upon me is let go. Let go &trust that God will make it right. 4give him and let it go. His loss… And in ur case it is def her loss. Men like u r hard 2 find… I will pray 4 U so that u as well as i find serenity.soon!
August 17th, 2008 at 10:29 am
Another idea is to open up the relationship. When you are open, you should also be honest about what you’re feeling about the relationship and any other aspects that affect it.
It’s certainly out there, check this out http://shoesonlytravel.com/blog/archives/13
August 19th, 2008 at 5:37 pm
This sounds exactly what I just went through. I met someone last year in October that I really did not want a relationship with, but after a few weeks gave in. He lied about his age, his employment, his living situtation and his martial status. He cheated on me with his wife that he was seperated from at the time he met me, but failed to tell me this. He had a lot of “friends” most of them girls and lied about every little thing. I forgave him and ave the relationship another shot after I found out he cheated on me, but he just continued his behavior for the next three months of talking to his “friends” and when we would go out he always talked to other woman. It has now ended for about 2 months, but went on way too long. I am taking my own advice which is once I find out a person lies to me that is it because it shows their chracter right off the bat
September 11th, 2008 at 11:45 pm
Ladies, I need some advice. While I was on a break from my fiance of four years. I went on some dates. I never slept with any of them but I lied to my ex. He found out and then broke things off completely. There were some other issues that caused me to want a break but I won’t get into that. Today, I wrote him an email telling him I was sorry for lying and that I messed up for going on those dates. I told him that I realized how important he was to me and I was wanting another chance. I told him what I would change about me if we got back together and I told him that I wanted him to share my dreams and accomplishments. If you were him, would you date me again? Please help!!